Most people think that remarriages should have a higher success rate than first marriages.  The sad fact is that remarriages have a higher failure rate. Apparently, we don't learn from our mistakes and instead operate under the misguided notion that our marriage failed because we were with the wrong partner.  We think the solution is to simply switch partners. The good news is  that although we don't learn from our mistakes, we CAN learn from education and can greatly improve our odds at success and avoid re-divorce by taking marriage education classes. The research recommends taking "reuglar" marriage education classes plus a few designed just for stepfamilies.  In other words, you will benefit for couples communication skills as well as from knowledge about what to expect and how to manage the challenges particular to stepfamilies. 

People can do anything, even climb Mt Everest – even succeed at a remarriage with kids! – if they know what to expect and how to prepare.  We now have a tremendous amount of knowledge – research-based information that we didn't have just ten years ago about how to help stepfamilies not only succeed, but thrive. 

Visit the Stepfamily resource page for programs you can attend at your congregation or community center and also programs you can buy – do-it-yourself courses – you can watch the DVDs in your living room and follow along with the discussion guide. 

And, realize that you can also TEACH these programs in your community. They're designed to be presented by lay educators – just open the box, put in the DVD, and follow the instructor/leader's guide. You can be sure that your community needs such a program – start one!

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